Smokeyriver is currently an active staff member, server admin and self-proclaimed secretary to Godsdead. She received the rank of moderator in 2015, and admin in 2016 alongside vapecloudbear
She has a large involvement in server decision making, sorting out new staff applications, testing plugins, and keeping Godsdead semi-organised.
She runs the brewing plugin, and regularly adds new brews to be discovered.
Story[edit | edit source]
Smokey stumbled into the piratecraft world inside a cargo crate bound for Admin Island. She had been ordered by a powerful man from the Secretary Shipping Company to take care of his paperwork. However, en-route her crate came loose and drifted across the ocean.
She washed up on a sandy beach and freed herself. She came across some local farmers arguing and bickering about their disputed land. She tried to offer her assistance, but the farmers would hear non of it, continued to shout over her, and argue about their aching backs, hurting butts, and all manner of things.
Keeping a clear mind, and remembering her training, she did the only natural thing and murdered them, to rid the world of such horrors, and as a clear message to others who followed suit. She coined the term 'butthurt' to describe the bickering that had taken place.
Soon the phrase 'butthurt' was spreading across the lands, being used to describe all manner of arguments. Shocked by the immense scale of the butthurt in these new lands, she founded the 'anti-butthurt association', publishing many papers on the matter. Her most famous one being the 'Butthurt and Complaining' forum post, gathering worldwide attention and praise.
With her newfound fame, she caught the attention of Godsdead, who had still not received his cargo he ordered months earlier. She was hired and given a well paid position as secretary of the server, and used it to create a shoe brand.
Among her most notable accomplishments is the 'Denied' woman's shoe brand, featuring some of her most common catchphrases printed in bold on the side of a stylish shoe. Rumours have it that Godsdead is head over heals (no pun intended) for the shoes, and has over 400 pairs in his dungeon. No sole has come out alive (ok that was intentional).
She is also an accomplished brewer and grog master, creating many bootleg brews (sorry). Some of her grog is a real kick in the backside, you'd be shoepid not to try some (...).
With the puns out of the way, Smokey now resides with vapecloudbear, and lives a successful life as a server admin.