Shockerboyism

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Oh hello there! It seems you have clicked on the wrong wiki entry, please leave and have a good day.

Oh you're still here... er... You have stumbled into the wrong part of the wiki - please turn around, and watch your step on the way out.

Where is the way out? Well, where you came from! You see that beautiful 'back' arrow in the top left corner of the screen? Give that a click for me will you? Thanks

Why are you still here? Go away! *In Obi Wan voice* Shockerboyism is not the page you are looking for.

You're not going to leave, are you? You're just going to test my nerves. Alright, I see how it is. But know that I am not happy with you. I don't get paid enough for this s***...

An Introduction to Shockerboyism

Shockerboyism is the cult-like religion founded by Peppykiss395 in honor of the one, true great leader; Shockerboy686!

This amazing religion has gained a respectful amount of followers, leading to the creation of a discord group in which its members proceed to engage in acts of "shockerboying" in order to increase their relationships and bring them closer to Shockerboy himself. Among the other cults and religions that have emerged to rival the one great Shockerboyism, this one stands stronger and more magnificent than all the other...

Ok I can't... I can't, no more *wheeze*, I can't keep this up haha. I'm not continuing until I'm paid, until then... *wheeze* you can er.. enjoy the "shockerboying"... *bursts out into laughter*.

The 6 Commandments

Ok $20..$40..$80.. tha- oh, um. Well here's the rest of the wiki page, enjoy.

  • Thou shalt adore Shockerboy686
  • Thou shalt spam Discord with Shockerboy686 images
  • Thou shalt photoshop Shockerboy686 faces over every image
  • Thou shalt sacrifice yourself for Shockerboy686 if he needs sand
  • Thou shalt advertise Shockerboy686's youtube channel at every occasion
  • Thou shalt sUbScRiBe To ShOcKeRbOy686

These commandments should be followed at all times if you wish to go to Shockerboy Heaven, but more on that later.

Views on Afterlife

Ok 'atheists', what happens when you die? Nothing? BORING!

In a salesman voice

But, thanks to our all-new patented 'Shockerboy Life', that nothingness turns into paradise!

Experience shockerboy686 as you have never done before; now you no longer need to say goodbye to him when you go to sleep, or leave for work - now you can be around him everywhere - in Shockerboy Heaven. I can tell you are eager to hear more, so let's get into the details!

Features:

  • Some cats
  • Shockerboy686 clones that we killed so you could be around them
  • A cookie
  • A Shockerboy686 slide
  • A safe place for you to enjoy some "shockerboying"

Now, who wouldn't want that? Aside from everyone I know bar a few people, I think we can say that this is MUCH better than being a boring atheist or believing in those other, dumb religions.

What you can expect

Paradise.

What you will experience

Hell.

Further Reading

What did you expect to find in this section anyhow? You really thought there was more to read about this dumb religion thing? HA! No no no, you see the money they paid me only covers the basic wiki page. But seeing as you're down here already, I may as well treat you to some 'further reading' aye?

Ok so here's the question: Why wasn't Leonado di Caprio in the Pirates of the Caribbean movies?

I think he would have been great! I mean it's not the first time he would have been on a ship - hell he was on the Titanic, or that yacht from Wolf of Wall Street (great film, go watch). He would have gotten that Oscar so much quicker! Swap Orlando Bloom for Leonado and you got yourself a 10/10 film experience - you'll just need to make sure he doesn't say any dumb one-liners, like that "I'm the king of the world" nonsense. But hey, we can keep dreaming.

Further further Reading

Stuck around huh? Hmm...

Well seeing as I am the writer, and you have no influence on what I write here, I'm going to share a little poem with you.


The world spins ever faster,

yet feels slower just for me

Standing in the spotlight,

yet there is nothing left see


An independent thinker,

yet our lives are not our own

7 Billion people,

yet we stand alone


We strive for perfection,

yet we fail to achieve

Disproven facts,

yet we continue to believe


We aim to make a difference,

yet we have so little to give

Every second is a lifetime,

yet I have had no time to live


I hoped you enjoyed it.